Ninapintasantamaria's Blog

{April 20, 2009}   I’d like it noted…

I just raked a bunch of leaves off the fencerow in my yard, cleaned them out from behind the new trellises, and planted  climbing roses and  lilac bushes, all by myself!  I sound like I’m 2, don’t I.  Look Mommy!  All by myself!  *sighs*  I’d been waiting on my husband to have some free time to help me, but HAH!  I didn’t need his stinky old help anyways!  And the creepy old neighbor that I think is experiencing Alzheimer’s came over and offered to help me move the logs from in front of my fence.  That was the strangest thing.  Whatever.  I never expected to talk to him again after my husband told him not to ever approach me again.  He was standing on my rock wall, holding a shovel, Jason-style, screaming at me for God’s sake!  What else is a husband for, if not to take care of creepy old neighbors with no manners?  Honestly, I’m surprised he ever even thought about talking to me again.  Like I said, though, he may not remember the incident.  Course, he may not remember telling me I could borrow his lawn mower trailer, either.  I think I’ll just wait for the landscape crew to get the logs out of the way.  It felt good just to get out and do something in the yard.  I like being in the sun, and I like growing things.  I’ve been talking to my husband about backing off at work some, after we get some things paid off.  I talked to my supervisors today, and told them I’d like to be considered for the prn position that’s coming available soon.  I think that with everything else going on, I really need to de-stress and try to calm down for awhile.  I got on-line this morning and looked up irregular periods, spotting and late.  Stress, (yeah, I don’t have any of that) weight loss, (hmm…let’s see, is 30 pounds in 6 months considered extreme?), no exercise, (dirty word) pcos (half the family has it, but they’re overweight, insulin resistant, and fuzzy in places they shouldn’t be; in other words classic cases), and shitty diet (are pasta and sour gummy worms a food group?) can all cause irregular periods, spotting, and lateness.  Pregnancy can, too, of course, but we’re not discussing that, thank you very much.  Why me?  *sighs*  This isn’t the first, nor will it likely be the last, time I’ve baffled medical science.  Nothing about me is normal.  What did I expect?

{April 20, 2009}   Still nothing.

Yep.  I.  HATE.  MY.  UTERUS!  I hate my ovaries, I hate my cervix, I hate my breasts, I hate everything that makes me female right now.  Except for my tootie, it does sometimes have it’s good points.  😉     Anyway, finally got the YCU to see reason with the furniture.  Exchanged the ottoman for a smaller one, put the chair in the corner where it belongs, and ordered new end-tables.  Of course, it took a friend telling him the very same damn thing I told him, which made everyone present howl with laughter, except, of course, the YCU.  Heh.  I think that means……(Ooh!  Ooh!  Let me tell it!)  I.  Was.  RIGHT!  Which I usually am, of course, but no one seems to want to admit that until I either make them look like a jackass, or get really, really loud and embarrass them in front of their friends.  I haven’t found the magic button that makes them listen to reason in a calm and open-minded manner, yet.  I can’t seem to get past stubborn, pig-headed, and childish.  *sighs*  After he heard from the friend and the friend had the same idea I had, he let it sit for a day in the “Makes No Sense” pattern, and then told me to go ahead and move the chair, he wanted to prop up on the ottoman.  I’m not kidding.  AAAAARRRRRRSSEEEE!  Why must he be so difficult?  Why can’t he just see what I’m trying to tell him without the stubborn idiocy that seems to accompany him everywhere?  I sort of understand, because his foot was broken, but I strongly suspect that he’s only playing that card when he wants to get out of doing something.  I’m so tired of him acting like this.  What an ass.  Stubborn, pig-headed, childish, obnoxious, self-absorbed, childish ass.  And the bitch of the whole thing is that he thinks I’m crazy.  I think he’s manipulative in his own right sometimes.  I tend to make decisions and come to conclusions in seconds, whereas it takes him forever to decide anything.  He’s one of these people who has to study on it.  Even after I’ve already shown him where he’s going to end up.  I’ve learned that he doesn’t want me to show him, he wants to figure it out on his own, or he gets very grouchy.  Ok, so I offer suggestions to help get him there faster and still make him think he’s figuring it out on his own.  You know, “The man is the head of the house, but the woman is the neck.  And the neck can turn the head, any way it wants.”  Yeah.  My neck is suffering from cervical radiculopathy.  (Quite literally a pain in the neck.)  I’m trying to turn the head where it should go, but the head is insisting it’s right and won’t listen to reason!  I have no patience with this.  Don’t be an ass, see reason, and admit to someone else having an intelligent thought for once, and your life that you complain about all the time wouldn’t be so hard.  I’ve always had trouble understanding that.  I realize I’m opinionated and sometimes people just don’t care.  Fine.  But when I’m opinionated and right, can’t you just concede the point?  Why do I have to get frustrated and cry and get my feelings hurt when I’m right, you should have done fill in the blank, and listened to me?  I’ve never been one of those girls that acted dumb to get a boy’s attention.  I’ve also never been one to keep my mouth shut when the boy acted dumb.  Apparently, this makes me bitchy and hard to live with.  There’s usually a lot of eye-rolling involved, until someone figures out that they’ve wasted a lot of time, and if  they’d just listened to me in the first place, we wouldn’t have shaved an hour off our lives for no reason.  This caused me no end of irritation in high school, cause I didn’t have very many boyfriends.  I scared them off, so I was told.  I’ve been told so many times that that’s just men, and we just have to get used to it.  Why?  I don’t want to be alone, and I love my husband very much, don’t misunderstand me.  There’s a lot of things I can’t do by myself.  Nor do I want to try.  I just don’t understand why I’m the one who gets ignored, then has to deal with the irritation and anger when their “brilliant idea” didn’t work, and they had to resort to mine anyway.  I can’t help but point out that if they’d listen to me next time, (or at least consider my idea, and if it won’t work, have a good explanation as to why) we’d save time, and not argue, and (oh my!) learn from the situation so it doesn’t happen again, but it keeps happening, and keeps happening, and keeps….lather, rinse, repeat.  I even try to explain that I just don’t want it to happen again.  I get completely ignored this time, as his quota for “helping” him is up.  I just can’t stand to watch someone struggle with something that could so easily be fixed, except that they’re too stubborn and proud to accept help from a girl.  A “thank you, I should have listened to you in the first place” would be nice once in a while.  A team has no place for an ego problem, folks.  I just don’t get it.

et cetera