Ninapintasantamaria's Blog











{July 11, 2009}   I read a new book

I really need to work when I’m at work. And only work. And only think about work. I read a book by a certain tv celebrity called Be.lly Lau.ghs. I should never have read this book. I usually can’t read books that dumb down pregnancy and delivery for the masses such as the Wh.at to Exp.ect…. books, and others, because they get on my nerves, and I have the hardest time trying to decipher what they’re talking about. I’m too medically minded. I get in trouble a lot at home for speaking ‘nurse’. Not that they’re not educational for the masses, but I’ve seen the end result, and in reading pre-natal records for several years, reading your blogs, and having my own delivery experience that I’d really rather forget, I’m to the point that I kinda think I get it. I think I know what to expect. I know what anesthesia people I want already, I know who my nurses are, I even know what they’re gonna say. Well, for a normal delivery, anyway. C-section or otherwise. Whatever. I realize that the only way I know these things is that I worked with them, and I’m a narcissistic control freak. But it’s very comforting for control freaky people like me, and I’m ok with that. However, after reading this book, I had an argument with my husband because it freaked me out to the point of insanity. This book talks about all the things she was afraid that she did wrong the whole time, and her reactions to other people. And in my sane brain (not the placenta-fied one) I know that she didn’t do anything wrong. But people kept coming up to me all day and asking me if I knew she had a son that was autistic. Which I also know has nothing to do with anything, but when my husband accused me of begging out of cleaning the bathroom because I was being lazy, instead of not wanting to breathe the chemicals which can cause birth defects, I flew into orbit. You know, that place I’ve kinda been in and out of for the last few weeks anyway. *sigh* I’m a little bit obsessive. And I think I’ve been repressing some fears that sorta came out of my mouth in a pile of shit I slung at my poor husband along with his pillow and a blanket last night. I apologized, but I don’t know if he’ll ever forget it, or forgive me. It really wasn’t his fault. Although, I’d like it noted that I wasn’t being lazy. Much. I’ve worked too much this week, with no end in sight, I’m not gonna get a maternity leave, I’m not gonna be able to stay home with my child, no word on the job front for my husband, and I can’t figure out how to put someone I work with in her place without making my job more difficult or tattling to the higher ups, or getting accused of “lateral violence.” Yeah, apparently that’s a new buzzword for bullying, standing up for yourself, or generally correcting stupidity. I never knew I was a bully, but apparently, having high expectations of people, voicing them, trying to be nice and get along, and generally trying to make it a nice, safe day for everyone makes me a pushy bitch with rn-itis. This is a buzzword made up many moons ago by people who resent having to work with nurses who they think abuse their power. Apparently, we’re all lazy, bossy, and afraid to get our hands dirty. I missed that memo, I guess. I think I’m a little stressed out. I need a margarita, but I think the doctor’d probably frown on that. *sigh again* Sorry for the radio silence, but I’ve just been too tired when I get home to do more than halfway keep up with all of you, or post myself at all. I did have an appointment with my OB this week, but I can’t post any pics cause my husband’s laptop that is hooked up to the scanner took a shit. And it’s gonna cost $125to fix. So I won’t be posting pics anytime soon. But my SON is a flasher, albeit in utero. I’m so proud.

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rosesdaughter says:

I’ve been trying to avoid, “what to expect” and Belly Laughs, but it’s out there, and I got my greedy little hands on it, and the rest is history. I seriously think that book should be bannned!!! And don’t feel bad about not posting, I’m averaging once a week!!



narcissistic control freak.

a woman after my own heart.



battycatlady says:

You need to read something that is not baby related. I have good news for you– the next Twilight book will be back in my hands tomorrow.



CityGirl says:

The laptop took a shit. LOL

I just said they other day that my car “shit the bed.”

Not often you meet someone else who assigns bodily functions to inanimate objects. :o)



Nina says:

Anytime. Actually, this is my husband’s vernacular, not mine so much. But, I thought it fit here. I feel like swearing a lot suddenly.



g says:

I read my obstetrics textbook when I had a question about my pregnancy. I’m not a fan of the non-clinical literature, either 🙂

g



Kristin says:

Can’t wait to see the u/s pics. My boys were all flashers too.



Nina says:

I wonder if he’ll be born in a little trench coat and sunglasses?



becomingwhole says:

Lateral-violence, my ass. Sounds like bullshit. I’ll have a margarita for your placenta-fied brain.

If he does come out in a trench coat and sunglasses, I MUST see a picture of that.



Nina says:

Yes, you certainly shall.



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