Ninapintasantamaria's Blog

{May 18, 2010}   Prosthesis, anyone?

I never have a normal week, we’ve established that. As I was going home yesterday, I saw a wreck where one of those old-fashioned tin-foil Datsun trucks got spun around like a top, after being plowed into by a new Mustang. But I had the baby with me. So I says to myself “Self, this would look really bad if you didn’t stop, being a nurse and all.” “But I have the baby with me” I answered. So, I did the next best thing. I slowly pulled around the wreck, rolling down my window and called out to the drivers to see if they were ok. After everyone waved at me, I felt it was safe to continue, but I did inquire. After all, I had the baby with me! So, then. I decide on the way home to visit the Wal-Mart. After I get the Offspring loaded back in and am driving out to the road, I notice something strange in the little grass island at the farthest boundary of the parking lot. There was what appeared to be an unconscious man laying half on the grass and half on the curb, in the glaring sunlight. And that wasn’t even the strangest part. There was a prosthetic leg standing up next to him. Evidently he was an above the knee amputee. Now, I couldn’t tell if the man was homeless, drunk, injured, or a thief (or worse) laying in wait for the first innocent person to approach, (and I had the baby with me!) so I tried to call the Wal-Mart and get hold of the manager to take care of things. Apparently, they don’t have a switchboard or anything in there, cause they never answered. I hated to call 911 if the guy was just drunk, or something, but laying out in the sun with no cover drunk can get you a serious case of heatstroke in a hurry, so I called the non-emergent city hot-line and explained things. I think they thought I was a crank caller. She kept having me repeat things and I kept having to tell her over and over again where exactly he was. (On a side note, Fletcher is holding his own bottle and I just witnessed him take it out and put it back in his little mouth! Squee!!) You can’t make this shit up. By the time I got home, I fully expected someone to prostrate themselves across my front porch. I have this little black rain-cloud *…hovering under the honey tree, only a little black rain-cloud, pay no attention to me….* hanging over my head, I swear. Today, I was in the Pee-Pee Palace, aka the Cysto room. We do Urology surgery there. Extracting kidney stones, resecting prostates, inserting ureteral stents, etc. The x-ray bed quit working, the cysto cleaning room flooded, we couldn’t find stuff, and did I mention that I hate the Cysto room? Yeah.

Ok. So. Apparently the resident slow learner in my house (me) has been naughty. I am guilty of *gasp!* bottle propping my child. And turning my back. Now, most of the time, I’m in the same room, unless I run to the potty or something, but I guess this makes me a bad mother. He’s in a relaxed sitting position when I prop him, and now he’s holding his own bottle for the most part, soooo isn’t that ok? Hell, I don’t know. He doesn’t seem to have any lasting effects from it, so maybe I’m not in too much trouble? Please?

My husband was in an accident early last week. When he called me, I began to panic as I was concerned about where we were going to find the $500 deductible. Do you know, he called me back an hour later and said that the lady he hit wouldn’t give him any more than her name and her insurance policy and left, so when the police got there to file the report, they charged her with a hit-and-run, and he got off scot-free! I told him he should have gone to buy a lottery ticket, cause if that had been me, they’d have found a reason to put me under the jail. Then the insurance company totaled his car, cut him a check for $1500 more than what he paid for it, and filed it under un-insured motorist insurance, so we didn’t have to pay but half the deductible! Like I said, lottery ticket. *shakes head in wonder* I never have a normal day.


Kristin says:

Sounds like the kind of day I would have…LOL.

HA! The fake leg was hilarious. Poor guy!!! I wonder if anyone ever came to check on him.
The luck your husband had is unreal! Who gets MORE money than what they paid for their car?? LOL! I am glad you didn’t get shafted!

May says:

Nope, that was not a normal week. But hey, you write about it so amusingly!

rosesdaughter says:

WOW. and yeah on the money for the car!!

Quiet Dreams says:

What a week! Yay for the car money! Woot!

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