Well, that’s what I’d like to tell you, but in truth, I’ve been lazy. After I come home from work, I’m so tired, I can’t move. I’ve been catching up on housework this weekend. We’re having Fletcher’s birthday December 11, so we’ll be getting ready for that in a few weeks. I wanted to try out some new baking recipes this week, but…we’re poor. As usual. In other news, we’re almost done with Christmas! We have my nephew, my offspring, and my husband to buy for. *one-woman conga line: WE GET TO HAVE A CHRISTMAS! WE GET TO HAVE A CHRISTMAS!* I am excited about putting up the tree, since I haven’t done that in a couple of years.
This next story is so insane, you’re gonna think I’m making it up, but everybody involved fessed up and admitted to it. I really, really, never have a normal day. I got home Thursday night and was toodling around the house, playing with Fletcher, watching tv, lurking on all my friends’ blogs, you know, the usual. The roomie comes in while I’m making Fletcher a bottle and comes running out of his room wanting to know what the hell happened in there. I don’t go in his room unless it’s a dire emergency or I need a book (his room is my old guest room and houses all my bookshelves), so I had no idea what he was talking about. I go in and there, on the bed, was a bottle of lube, and blood on the comforter. Yeah. Um. Ew. So. I was as clueless as he was, but as my husband had told me not to come home early that day because he MIGHT be wrapping Christmas presents, it looked really, really bad. I called him immediately, of course, demanding an explanation, which he didn’t have, at first. He then called and told me he accidentally told one of his friends where the spare key was hidden and the friend brought a girl over. Now. I realize that this sounds REALLY far fetched and that he’s probably lying, right? Well, naturally, the roomie was so pissed at the invasion of his privacy, and I was still suspicious, so we both confronted all parties concerned. I even talked to the Lovely Assistant, who was out shopping with YCU all day, and I know he wouldn’t lie to me. He likes me better than my husband, or so he says! 😉 Like I said before, all parties actually confessed, but I spent 24 hours scared out of my mind that my husband was running around with me oblivious to the fact. Now, my husband has never given me even an ounce of evidence in that directions, but, stranger things have happened, right? I suppose there are some holes in the story, but I truly don’t think the Roomie (who was really pissed), the Lovely Assistant, YCU, and the stupid, disrespectful, inconsiderate, inappropriate friend are all lying. The Roomie talked to the SDII friend and he told him the same thing he told my husband. I can only assume my husband went through the list in his head of who could have gotten into the house and who knew where the key was and narrowed it down by process of elimination. YCU thought I was gonna throw him out on his ass with the clothes on his back, and had he really been doing what I’d originally thought he’d been doing, he would’ve been right, but, thank goodness, he wasn’t, and I didn’t. So, I immediately deleted the guilty friend from my fB account, and told my husband that I EXPECTED not to see him again. EVER. I mean, really? Bringing a stranger into my house (that I hadn’t cleaned in like, ever)? WITHOUT US THERE? WTF???!!!! I swear on my mother, I will housebreak every damn one of my husband’s friends. The Bitch Factor is about to increase exponentially. Seriously, this is the kind of shit that happens to ME. I am an innocent victim, dammit! Flabbergasted is not even close to how I still feel about this subject. WE. ARE. NOT. AMUSED.
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